March 16, 2008
Jesus, so much anguish I have caused You these last few days, weeks, months, years because of my sins. Every time I lost my temper, I drove the nail into Your hand. Every time I refused to listen, I gave You another blow with the whip. Every time I ignored my neighbor, I added more weight to the cross You carried. How selfish I have been!
Through Your words, kindness, and love, You showed me my neighbor. Yet in my sinfulness, I ignored them, moved on, said ‘no’. My sins put You on that cross – my sins yelled out ‘crucify Him.’
Lord, You saw all of my failures and sinfulness during Your passion, yet You chose to die for me. You saw every sin that I committed and every sin that I will ever commit, and yet, You freely extended Your arms and legs. You loved me so much that You took my sins and bore them to Yourself. You loved me as a sinner so you could free me from that sin. Saint Paul stated that You, Jesus, took on so much sin into Your pure, innocent, perfect body that it was like God made You to be sin.
Yet, You wait for me in spite of my sin; ready to forgive me with the love only a Father could give. God, You are the merciful Father in the Parable of the Lost Son. You are waiting anxiously for my return; standing at the doorway, watching for me to walk humbly down the filthy, rocky road back to You. As my Heavenly Father, You never stopped, nor could stop, loving me. There is nothing that I could ever do to make You stop being my Father.
As I stumble back to you and humbly confess my sins, You embrace me tightly, joyous of my return, forgiving me of all of my sins. You know that I could never completely atone for my sins, so You sent Your only Son to take these sins from me. You order the banquet of Your divine Son, the Mass, so I can share in Your holiness that I too can become holy. You know that I am weak and can not remain holy, so You give me many opportunities to repent. The Sacrament of Confession, the Confiteor, Kyrie, Gloria, Eucharistic Prayer I, the Lord’s Prayer, and the Invitation to Communion are some of Your ways of keeping me holy at Mass, when I receive You, when I am in a common union with You and the Church.
My Lord, help me to remember Your mercy and Your love as I walk with You in Your Passion and Resurrection.